A Most Noble Shaman, Sarah!

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These next dreams are a wonderful journey into the rarefied world of Black musical genius.  The dreams were had on the eve of my thirtieth birthday, also a time, when America was about to unleash its warring might on Iraq – a campaign which would span some two-plus decades. 

The dreams were some of the most lucidly awakened.  Most of all, the dream with Sarah Vaughan was one of the most glorious dream experiences imaginable. 

A bit of leap off here but after all these dreams shared herein, it suddenly occurred to me that I’ve not done something as natural as having shared the Michael Overleaves of persons herein.  Merlin and I were/are Task Companions and that was his sixth life at 7th level mature, artisan-cast Scholar in acceptance (yeah!)  I am, of course, also 7th level mature, bluntly combative sceptic third life thereat in 6th position (hello the dreams!) of third cadence of third greater cadence, growth and passion. 

I became a Michael Student, on discovering the Quinn-Yabro Michael books, when Merlin was sick with full-blown AIDS in summer 1988 and it was the most arrestingly humbling experience to have met original group member SC 9 years later, herein referred to as Mathilde Duchenne – the pseudonym is a nod to a life in Barbados wherein she was a madam and I was her most prized worker – statuesque, stunning and entertained the seafarers, one of whom was a reincarnated king soul – who in an earlier famous incarnation was then sixth young, passion, dominance, idealism – Saladin, at whose court I danced with a cadence mate in fifth position (known in this life) and our respective Essence Twins whilst my then soldier TC (Merlin) whilst part of Richard Coeur de Lion’s crusading troops saw me dance and was blown away. 

This most recent get-together with my TC, then Merlin, was our 43rd and seven glorious years they were which continued long after both, of course, indulging in moments of sublime essence contact and energy transference as betrayed in the very lucid astral plane dreams herein…  For me, having been brought up by a musically gifted mother – whose love was sadly not readily forthcoming, she was though innately stylish and possessed of inordinate intellect.  She was also for long decades the only West Indian to have had her hymns published in the hymnal of the American Wesleyan church’s West Indian branch the Pilgrim Church – all that young-souled religiosity did wonders to hone my scepticism.  Harella was fourth mature Scholar… I’ve an obvious soft spot for scholars and 33 years after her passing my opinions and love for her have matured favourably rather than not. 

In any event, Harella was always singing and I have always loved Sarah Vaughan because something about her always reminds me of Harella, the complexion, the look, the round shoulders, the almost non-extant neck but the voice: warm, nurturing, maternal and stellar.  Though I’ve always been fanatical about Betty Carter – weeee! – I grew to love Sarah Vaughan when Merlin and his mentor, John Hirsch, grew even closer for both being full-blown with AIDS and we having spent so much time together; just the four of us, Merlin and me, and John – fifth mature warrior and his artisan task companion, Montréalais artist, Bryan Trottier, who proved a vile piece of work on Merlin’s passing which was months after John’s…

Bryan was repression mode, cynic, moving part of emotional centre, rejection goal and slid tremendously into acceptance and the negative pole thereof thus making him rather ingratiating and proving himself one phuch-all lugubrious sycophant with secondary CF of self-destruction, hence the bottle as pacifier in later life.  Bryan was then in the thrall of über-shit disturber, cum lost village idiot clown – with no discernible talent save being able to scheme and con her way from one nanosecond to the next, Elektra Skanczchowicz – fifth young slave in power mode with penchant for leather and for interfering in others’ lives and wanting to phuch with someone… anyone…  I am so glad to be rid of that ludicrous no-talent clown!  What is it about slaves and me in this lifetime? If it is not an old slave, I am loathe to have to interact with such fragments overlong – they really do present my impatience with a thorough challenge what with being 6/3/3 on a third life – vituperatively and with the greatest panache, ‘Go take your $hit elsewhere!’ 

These are things that are good to know.  I think one validates being a serious Michael Student as when in that dream recently shared of the female First Nation’s artist’s daughter that I speculated to self that she was likely in dominance – A couple of exquisite, old-souled gems.  For me, this is good work because it is so good to transcend the obvious pitfalls of waking state Maya.  Trust you me, most people in the waking state simply project their labels automatically.  It is no end of tedium to have some somnambulant lost soul start aggressively projecting onto you their embarrassingly myopic views when encountering me for seeing someone Black and god forbid male.  Don’t you realise that I am you in a past and future life, get over your tunnelled little perspective? 

Obviously, names were changed but I would be damned if I was not going to have some delicious fun assigning appropriate pseudonyms in the process – this incidentally was something at which Merlin excelled…  Although, since I have a fondness for Dravidian names, there are times when such names are used rather than cutting pseudonyms like Elektra’s, for example Mathilde Duchenne’s adept, V, is known where herein encountered as, Kritika Bhatt. 

To date, I’ve charted some 200 plus Michael Overleaves and it would well have been more, were it not for my protracted slow dance with starving artistdom. 

Whilst the Moon transited both Sagittarius and my seventh house, on Wednesday, August 1, 1990, I would awaken into these most luscious of dreams. 

<O>

Very intense and very involved these dreams and again there was a great deal of travel here.  I was in a city which was very moisture-heavy.

It was dark out; it seemed as though the light, though at daytime, was blocked out because there was a mist or there were a lot of moisture-heavy clouds which left the place really grey out.

It was a very ancient city and very much so like London, England.  In parts, it also seemed like Paris.  However, it was a mélange of London, England and, too, Bangkok.

It was at night-time and I was in a place where I saw the river.  This river was very much like the River Thames.

It was just as wide as the River Thames is and the river was very black and swollen.  It was fast-flowing and very ripe with a great sense of moisture.

As I was standing in this area, it was like standing in a circus.  It was a place much like Trafalgar Square.  This place, however, was not as large.  There was a central monument that had steps going up to it.

I was on the steps and looking off over the embankment.  The predominant stone of the architecture here was the same tone of limestone as was used in the Pont Neuf, as well as many buildings in Paris and in certain parts of London, England.

I was trying to look over the embankment because Arne Naess, who is Diana Ross’s husband, was talking.  I could see him and he had his back turned to me.

He was giving a tour and talking about how much he really does like his two sons and how happy he is to be a father again.

The first son, he said, was like Michael and I suppose that he meant like Michael Jackson.  Perhaps, he does have another son named Michael.  If not it would, I suppose, mean that Ross was quite a performer.

“Ross is very much so like his mother…” he was saying, “…and very much so a night creature.”

“An exhibitionist, there is no way that he’s not going to be a performer,” Arne was saying with resignation.

“Then Evan Ross” (Naess) he said, laughing at the mention of his last son’s name, “Evan is so much like me.

“If I turn in at eight o’clock or ten o’clock, whenever I turn in, Evan does too.  We’re very close and he always sleeps right through.

“He’s not a problem; a very silent and very, very contented child.  Not a problem at all.  I’m very, very pleased that I’m close with him.”

He then pointed out the bridge which had a terrace, like the terrace Tuileries along the banks of the Rive Seine, where you could walk by the water’s edge.  He said that he had bought this bridge for Diana Ross, as a result, it was now private property.

It was part of his vast real estate holdings in London, England.  It was, he shared, a present for Diana Ross.  As he said that, I then saw Diana Ross walking – her left profile and back visible from my vantage point.

She wore a London Fog or Burberry coat that went down to just below her knees with her bare legs visible.  It was beige, creamish-coloured as were the matching high heels that she wore.

Her hair was pulled back off her face and gathered in a loose curly puff in the back.  It was shoulder length hair.  I noticed as she walked that the belt around her waist was tied very tightly.

As if to protect herself from the chill of the dank air, Ms. Ross had her arms wrapped around her waist.  She was walking along the bridge alone and there was no traffic at all on this now private bridge.

He had said that he had bought it because,

“She has always loved walking on this bridge.  It means a lot to her and where she’d always go to when she returned to London… to think and meditate.

“It was one of the few places where she could really escape, not just in London but the world.”

Apparently, when he bought it for her, she was in Paris and called to let her know.

“She immediately got on her plane, dropping all her engagements, and flew here.  She was so ecstatic, screaming with delight.

“She was genuinely happy,” he said.

“It’s her own little retreat and she can walk on it whenever she desires,” he said.

It was very nice to watch her walk whilst totally self-absorbed.

I was trying to think of which bridge it was because it very much so reminded me of the Pont Neuf.  However, I know that it wasn’t that bridge because I got a strong sense that it was in London and not Paris.

It was on the St. James Park side of the Mall and going towards the Admiralty Arch.  On your left, you were actually able to see Admiralty Arch.

It was very, very black with age but also because of the ton of moisture-soaked moss.  It was covered here with a ton of ivy.

This was interesting because when I had dreamt of Francesca, for the first time, there was a great deal of the same large-leafed ivy on the building.  It was a very small circus – pedestrian and not for traffic.

I thought that it felt a great deal like London so decided to take a little walk and went up to cross the mall and go up towards Admiralty Arch.

I wanted to go in that direction, to check to see if I would happen on Trafalgar Square, thereby validating that it was London.

I headed off and soon noticed that there were many people in the city and a bustling city it was too.  Everybody was very quietly introspective.

Not too much noise and confusion or clutter.  I was zinging with energy for being in this very august city walking very rapidly.

As I was going, I saw a very modern complex.  It sat way across, like on the distant side of Trafalgar Square, to the north.

It was very large, very modern and of a very unusual design.  A lot of glass, steel and green chrome and very polished brass and not gold.

*Incidentally, in time, London, England would know just such a building.  It is the egg-shaped London City Hall.  However, here in the dream as it laid incubating in the architect’s creative imagination, it was lots of dark, soulful, green chrome and brass.  The latter is, however, not part of the actualised schema.  END.

**The building is actually the Swiss Re or Gherkin Tower not the London City Hall.  END.

When I was leaving the pedestrian place, I had turned around and looked in the direction of Buckingham Palace.  There, I saw a perfect, perfect, tiny chapel like Sainte Chapelle in Paris.  However, this one was even smaller.

As was like Sainte Chapelle, it was as if for the exclusive use of royalty.  It was in the Gothic style and with a very tall spire.  It was so squat to the ground that it almost seemed like it was a hut more than a cathedral.  Nonetheless, it was very Gothic.

In fact, it more so resembled those gold-spired Buddhist temples in Bangkok that are very dome-shaped with very, very tall spires.  This chapel’s spire was way taller than the chapel was.  This chapel was also white limestone – more appropriately, it was white marble.

I was going along the street and looking up at the buildings to try and make them out as I went.  Sometimes I would even have to step off the curb, briefly going into the street, to get a good look at the buildings.

It was so cluttered here that it reminded me of the crowdedness of the environs of the Hippodrome.  As I was going along, I noticed up ahead a tall, modern building that was blue.

It was as tall as the post office tower in London but bluer, even skinnier and easily taller.  Behind that in the distance, in all that fog, I could then make out what seemed the CN tower.

I thought then and there,

‘What city is this anyway, London?  Bangkok?  Toronto?  After all Toronto can’t be that close to London.’

I knew that it clearly couldn’t have been London, England.  It was so very modern on the other side of the road and looked very North American.

As I had earlier, I then looked off to the left.  This time I was way on the other side of the Mall, well beyond heading into Soho and past Trafalgar Square, heading as if up towards Piccadilly Circus.

There, I saw a very interesting sight.  What I now saw was a duplicate cathedral of the Gothic spired shrine that lorded where Buckingham Palace ought to have been.  This one was made of white gold and was glimmering in the light even though it was foggy.

It was therefore not a blinding reflection of the Sun.  It was zinging with a life all its own.  It was absolutely magnetic.  I thought,

‘Well, darlings, you’re definitely not in Kansas.’

I then decided that I would go off.  I really wanted to go explore the other side of the river.  I wanted to be able to see Diana Ross.  If not, I thought that I could go into the mall close by to try and find out what city this was.

I just wanted to explore the place.  Even more, what place was this where the predominant signature here architecturally was deco?  However, all was very modern with very deco lines to everything.

I went off and when I went into the mall, there was a restaurant that I went into.  It was green on the inside with depictions of plants everywhere and a lot of white.  There were as well waiters in green and white uniforms.

It was like a fast-food joint.  I recalled this man saying that he was a vegetarian and he wanted to know if they did not have anything that he could have.  He was stout and White.

There were these doors that led out into a beautiful, little, enclosed garden which was too Zen for words.  I decided to go out to drink up its beauty.

I also wanted to know if I couldn’t use it as a shortcut to wherever the bridge was.  I wanted to get to Diana Ross’s private bridge.  Finally, it was all that I wanted to see.  I was, however, having problems getting the door to open.

Finally, when someone was coming in, I went out the door.  I had not made an effort to buy anything.  It was a burger joint and a very posh upscale one at that.

When you left the eatery, by going through the back, it was in a park that was off from the street.  It was very, very beautiful here.  I wandered my way through it enjoying its large sycamores and other trees.

There were lots of heavy, old-wooded trees.  It was very expansive and healthy here.  I went around and came upon this very huge building.  It was a very, very exclusive and expensive hotel.

There was another tiny, little private street.  It was one which celebrities used to access the hotel when staying there.  The entrance was for celebrities and, of course, royalty.

This was so that they could not be bothered out front, on the busy thoroughfare, and have to deal with the nuisance of the paparazzi.

It was a white hotel of the same stone and looked as the buildings in Whitehall, London.  A very, very big and colossal building it was.

I went around and all you saw were well-healed people coming and going from the hotel.  They were all Black and very, very wealthy.

They looked very much so like Black Americans rather than Black Africans or Black Europeans or West Indians.  They were also in the entertainment business.  They were very much so musicians in the Jazz genre.

There was a very tall, High-Yellow woman.  She looked a lot like Stephanie Dabney – former prima ballerina with the Dance Theatre of Harlem.  She was older and had an entourage with her.

She had a whole load of suitcases and equipment as she awaited her ride.  There was a beautiful, black, convertible Porsche that was seated there.

Diana Ross’s son was in a yellow shirt and shorts.  The shirt was very bright yellow with a little floral design on it.  He was standing there looking much older than he is in real life.

He was looking at the car admiringly smiling at it and you knew that he wanted one.  You could tell that he just wanted to get into it and drive it.  It was Ross and you could see the definite resemblance to both her and him – his parents – in his face.

There were tons of security people as well as porters in navy-blue uniforms.  The porters’ was almost like a cadet’s uniform with gold stripes around the sleeves and gold buttons.  They wore hats; it was all very soigné and posh.

The musicians were very soulful, well-travelled, Black American, Jazz musicians.  They were very tall with distinctive features.  Theirs were faces that looked more iconically like African masks than anything else.

I then got going along not wanting to be seen gawking at anyone.  That was when I noticed another woman who turned out, in fact, to have been a much younger version of Betty Carter.

It was her and she also had an entourage of her own though one not as big as the other woman’s.  I saw her with a man.  Studying her right profile as she was talking, I intently looked at her.

However, I declined going over and interacting with her.  She was very well-fortified spiritually and did not want to be a celebrity.  She wanted to be left alone.  That much was obvious.

I went along and you could hear the river which was off to the right and the hotel was on the left of the tiny, little, private road.  To the right were all these heavy, big trees on this private road.

It basically was on the embankment of the river where there was a terrace with steps that led down to the River Thames with these huge, colossal trees that lined the top of the cliff.

You had to meander down the old, stone staircase which was, of course, dank and mossy.  There were different, little landings on the way down to the dark, fast-flowing and swollen river far below.

The further down you went, the greater the vista as more of the overhanging trees were out of distracting view and gave a better view of the very, very wide and commanding river.  It was noisy but very soothingly so.

When I got down to the first landing who should I see, off to the left in a corner, but Tina Turner.  She wore high heels, a skirt and a suit.

It was supposedly an Azzadine Alaïa.  It was a powder-grey, pinstriped suit and so powder-grey, in fact, that it was almost silver.  She was, indeed, looking fine.

It matched the exact colour of her hair which here was grey.  She had it pulled back off her face and wore a blue band from ear-to-ear that kept her mane back in place.

It was a beautiful, soothing, blue colour with tons of jewels throughout it.  It was not a mandarin collar.  Rather, it was a small-lapelled suit which was buttoned high up almost to the neck.

She was searching through her bag and was with a couple of men.  These men were a part of her entourage.

She was standing there having just left the hotel where she had been received, along with the other luminaries, by Diana Ross who was holding court.

This beautiful place was where Diana Ross was staying now.  She had had Tina Turner and the others by for tea – very formal.  Tina Turner had come out to wait for her ride but had slipped down onto the landing on the terrace to talk with these men.

When I saw her my spirits soared and I graciously said,

“Hello Tina…”

I clasped my hands in the Buddhist prayer manner and added,

“…How are you?  Kuon Ganjo…” at that I bowed to her as I walked by.

She was on my left and I did not want to stop and interrupt her.  By not stopping, I wanted her to be at ease and not feel her space being invaded by a proprietary fan.

She was in conversation, however, warmly smiled at me being very polite and appreciative.  I was pleased that here was another celebrity and she was not being rude.

She was being reverential in return and appreciative by way of the reference that I made to our both being Buddhists.  She smiled acknowledging me, to which I awkwardly added, as I was so stunned that she would acknowledge me let alone be so warm,

“And god bless…”

She thanked me.

I then went and looked over the edge.  The view from the terrace was so breathtakingly gorgeous.

Listening to the music of the ripened river was like the same resonant rapture I experienced when, on the embankment in London, England, I saw the River Thames for the first time in this life.  It was quite incredible.

I decided to proceed down and came down to another landing.  There were two of the musicians who are presently in Betty Carter’s band – the piano player and the bassist.  They were alone together.

I suppose that the man, to whom Betty Carter was talking upstairs on the private road, was the drummer.  I thought that it made perfect sense because here were the other two members of the quartet.

They were talking of Tina Turner saying,

“And did you notice that her blouse is a definite Ruth or Louise Browne of Los Angeles.”

This was obviously a very au courrant, very expensive designer.  They were very impressed with it.  I thought it funny because here were these wonderful, elevated musicians yet they were quite impressed by celebrities.

Then again, they were very young and were just starting out in their very august careers in the business.  So, of course, it made a great deal of sense that they should be star-struck.

I admiringly stood there and shyly said hello to them.  They warmly, gentlemanly responded.

I then moved off and went to stand facing the mighty river.  I was being made high, by all this beauty, having seen all these stellar musicians – these icons of Black culture.

Diana Ross.  I saw Betty Carter in this dream.  I saw Tina Turner in this dream.  These are three very elevated, Jazz singers in their own spheres with all these Jazz musicians.

It was quite a dream indeed and very, very, soulful.  It was very definitely on the astral plane because of the feel of it and the nature of it.

The intensity of the dream and the way in which I was so at peace with both nature and persons encountered, for being in this high-astral plane place which was possessed of such harmony, spoke to this being a dream of high moment for me.

When I stood there on the terrace, drinking in the thunderous roar and the healingly soothing, symphony of the River Thames rushing by below, I felt that sense of home and oneness.

It proved to be the end of that particular and very, very intense, involved and most multilayered of dreams.

<O>

It was night time, in the second dream this day.  I was in the streets of a place which I did not recognise.  There was a woman who was trying to park a very light blue, beautiful, beautiful car.  It was more like a station wagon in design.

It turned out to have been Sarah Vaughan – driving the station wagon – who, of course, is now passed on.

It was in a locale that I did not quite recognise at all.  Again, the feel here was of being still on the astral plane – not surprising, considering that Sarah Vaughan is now an astral plane habituée.

There were some other cars parked, as well, along that side of the street.  It was a very fine car, very heavy-looking.  It was almost like a Sherman tank and not a flimsy, little, computer-turned out car.  A very sturdy automobile it was.

She was quite meticulously trying to parallel-park the car.  She was quite obviously not accustomed to driving herself nor, for that matter, was she particularly comfortable driving.

However, all this was secondary to what was going on because she was singing.  She was warming up and by doing so, what she was doing, was singing an aria.

She was singing a male – tenor’s aria from an opera.  She was singing away.  She had such an incredible voice.  Ms. Vaughan’s voice proved a superbly stellar instrument.

I was astounded because here I was standing off to the side watching her try to park the car.  I was intently looking at her left profile studying her face, her round shoulders and almost nonexistent neck.

In that sense, she was so much like Harella.

She would sing very heavy-sounding bass and sounded just like a man.  Then she would do her vocalesing and slip into a very high-pitched and very complex dimension.

She was hitting high Cs that were just the warm up for where she would take you.  I really was transported by her singing.  It would be just this wonderful, wonderful vista onto which she would soar taking me along.

Such beautiful, beautiful feats musically that you can’t possibly share here in the waking state – it could only be experienced or articulated in the dreamtime’s pandimensionality.  It simply made me soar within.  It was quite incredible.

After she had parked the car, it opened.  Yvette Morehead came out and went and sat down.  She went and sat on a park bench and seemed as if a bag lady or confused.

I never did see Sarah Vaughan come out of the car.

I then moved on… it was just time to move on.  I don’t recall, in the least, having interacted with Yvette.

<O>

Art: Africa on her mind.

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Ghosts of Future-Past.

I found myself hovering over Times Square.  I was intently looking at a hotel in Times Square – the one that has the large oxidised globe on it.  I thought – this may be the Drake Hotel.

The building, at its upper storeys, had aspects of a pyramid or a ziggurat to it.  This was one of those monolithic sandstone buildings that were built in the 1930s – a decade when there was a real architectural renaissance in Manhattan.

It had a very large base that culminated in a stepped formation near the top.  The building sat on the west side of Eight Avenue, if I correctly remember.

Perhaps, it is not even a hotel – I thought, maybe, it is the headquarters for one of the city’s newspapers – with the globe at its zenith.  So, perhaps, it formerly housed or still does The New York Times.  After all, it is in Times Square – hence the name of the square.

After having hovered for awhile, I began to move very slowly; I was high up – several storeys high up.  I watched as the ubiquitous yellow vehicles of the city’s taxi fleet, way below, negotiated the congested traffic.  I was able to see beyond the usual as well.

I saw Carl Leroiderien† going to pick up tickets for a Broadway show.  He was walking past the stage door; he was going towards the front of house.

There was something about this man which I found rather sagely.  Soon, he passed out of view; he went off to see someone.  He stood out like a sore thumb.

I knew well enough not to come down.  Carl has never had any interest in me, save to be aggressive and socially hostile, so why bother?  He was off to be in his element because basking in the glow of the klieg lights was what his soul craved at the moment.

However, when Carl was leaving his Chelsea apartment, I saw him talking to Merlin.  I still hovered in the air outside a front window that faced Carl’s fire-escape.

“No, no.  I sent those manuscripts for you and you can just go over them,” he was saying to Merlin as he returned some of Merlin’s writings.

Carl, arrogant prick that he is, was insensitively dismissing Merlin’s writing by returning it.  Of course, he did so under the guise of being too occupied to read the manuscripts.

I could tell from Merlin’s tone that he was really hurt for having his creativity dismissed.  Merlin felt rejected.  Carl was a disingenuous schmuck.

Carl’s offhandedness with Merlin was obnoxious.  Clearly, he did not think that Merlin’s writing was worth his time but – platinum-tongued palaverist that he is – he also did not give an opinion of what he thought.

Carl had cleverly placed the writing into a small trunk, which had languished in the Bourbon Street basement of his tiny cottage, abandoned there for over a decade.  The manuscripts were water-damaged.

In presenting Merlin with the trunk, he would minimise the rejection by making it look like he had been intent on returning the trunk and its damaged contents.  The snub was not lost on either Merlin or me.

I was, at the time, just down the hall; it was a short distance from where Carl had been talking to Merlin.  Wounded as he was, Merlin never did come out from the apartment.

Whilst standing by two apartment doors, I kept watch.  People were coming and someone said,

“I think that there is someone by the door; I can just tell…”

Since I did not want Carl or Merlin to know that I was about, I hid in back of both doors to the landing.  In that way, I avoided being seen by Carl’s neighbours; I averted the kind of trouble that I did not need.

I then went down the hall.  The door on the right was the apartment where Merlin had been.  I went to the door and knocked.

On opening the door to answer, Merlin looked totally different.  Though the eyes were unmistakably Merlin’s, he was considerably taller.

Merlin was very light-skinned and unmistakably Black.  He had off-blond hair that was naturally curly which he wore in a loose, soft Afro hairdo.  He was casually dressed.

He pleasantly smiled, on recognising me, though he was wearing a different body.  He familiarly, warmly said,

“Come in…”

Oh to hear his voice embrace me.  Such sweet, sustained magic!

I entered.  It was obvious that he was making one of his spectacular meals.  I, almost immediately, noticed that he had bought a cake.  It was a wonderful loaf.  Obviously, from the look of things, he had spent a great deal of time working on the other dishes.

There was a baked squash dish which was flavoured with a sweet liqueur.  A veal loaf was surrounded by a sea of sliced onions.  It presently was atop the stove, though, it was supposed to be returned to the oven.

There were marvellous vegetables that were all at various stages of preparation.  He stood at a sturdy, wooden-topped, central cutting board table.  He was cutting up an assortment of the vegetables.

My mind relaxed, as the pungent aroma of all the different herbs and spices being liberally used proved satiating and filled me up.

It was wonderful to again be in Merlin’s presence.  I had the impression that he was Straight or, perhaps, Bisexual.

At the entrance of the apartment, on the left, there was a little alcove.  The kitchen began there but it also opened up into a larger room.  This actually was part of the living room; it was L-shaped and hugged the kitchen area.

There, in the apartment, was a young woman with Merlin.  There was also a woman who seemed infirmed; she was lying on a cot.  She was close to the kitchen area where Merlin was.  They kept each other company whilst Merlin chopped up the vegetables.

Merlin and I were affectionate but there wasn’t any physicality to it.  We did not hug each other when the door opened even though we recognised the revealing, shockingly displacing sight of each other.

Merlin had immediately recognised my eyes, on opening the door, just as I had his.  However, there was now a dimensional void between us.  Merlin was a ghost from the future for me whilst I was a, vaguely familiar, ghost from the past for him.  He was warm towards me.

Merlin was a very decent human being, I must say.

He was, now, easily 6 feet 3 inches tall.  Though not mesomorphic, he was also not the classic ectomorph that he had been in his immediate past life.

He was angular but not in the same way as I remembered him.  Merlin here did not wear glasses.  His eyes were large and even more soulful than they had been in his last incarnation.

It was so beautiful to see him.

The seasoning was so… spot-on.  It actually made my mouth water.

The woman then asked him, from the cot where she reclined, if he had put onions with the veal loaf.  When he said that he had, she told him that this was not right.

“Let me show you how to do the onion rings,” she called to him in a familiar, intimate tone.

Merlin then asked me to give him a hand and help him carry the things to her, just inside the larger room, on the cot.  I helped him get the veal loaf onto a large tray with some other things.  For whatever reason, at the last minute, I got some bananas and also put them on the tray.

We then came out, into the other room, where the younger woman was.  She seemed like a nurse or a caretaker for the older woman.  She was sitting there very silently observing us.

The older infirmed woman was very detailed with her directions for the preparation of the dishes and the garnishes.  Some party umbrella garnishes, which are often used to decorate foods and cocktails, were also on the tray with the food.

Merlin had sliced the bananas – actually, they were plantains.  The older woman had her arms clasped at her chest like an Egyptian mummy’s.  Merlin then bound her body with blue-striped gauze.  The blue stripes were like those of the Israeli flag.

She laid there immobile with her head raised on a cushion which had been strategically placed beneath the cot’s mattress.  She looked at Merlin and wearily said,

“Please, will you give me my last rites?  I want to hear you say that prayer.”

At that, Merlin began saying the Lord’s Prayer except that it was not at all the traditional Christian prayer of Christ.  Instead, this prayer seemed to hearken back to Egyptian times.  When he was finished the prayer, she uttered a soulful breath; it was the equivalent of Amen.

“Avuum…”

It is simply impossible to convey the sound she made.  It sounded like a three-syllable word.  Quite simply, the breath went out of her when she intoned the arcane breath.  Perhaps, at the end of each lifetime, this was the call the soul made when exiting the body.

Together, Merlin and I had said the word with her but not as she had soulfully done.  It was the chant of the dying which only a departing soul, accepting of the inevitable, could properly invoke.

When Merlin and I said it, in my mind’s eye, I instantaneously saw the word written out in bold letters of blue light.

Merlin got up and slowly, silently, walked away.  I got up after him and thought about the potency of the word.  I looked into Merlin’s face and saw that he was no longer the youthful man who had greeted me at the door.

Instead, he truly looked drained as though he had been channelling for too many hours.  He was truly exhausted for having performed the rite on her.

Merlin returned to the kitchen area.  I followed after him.  I began eyeing the cake thinking that it would make a nice snack.

‘Hmmm, doesn’t that look nice,’ I thought, although, it needed to be warmed up.

It was a wonderful, fat lumpy cake with sweets in it – rather pleasing to look at.

“My, my, won’t I be glad to get some of this come dessert time.” I said in a quiet whisper. 

On Tuesday, March 24, 1992 as the Moon transited Sagittarius and my seventh house, whilst in dream flight, I projected myself into the future.

Whilst there, I dreamt the preceding dreams which proved the most sublime encounter with Merlin.  It was not just a glimpse into the future but proved to be illuminating, inspiring even.

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Ran into an old dancer friend from eons past…  we sat about chewing the fat – and god was there much to chew at…  I riotously laughed out loud when he said, “My god who knew you had this rich inner life going down back when I knew you… you just seemed so removed, remote even, from it all…”  Indeed, sometimes it seems – at least back then – it is best to just keep quiet and not engage in the Maya.  As there are never lies in dreams, it seemed an utter waste of time to bother engaging far too many persons met along the way back there. It was a surprise to me in late teens when I discovered that not everyone dreamt with the same élan as do I.  Then again, who wants to be burnt at the stake – at least socially.  Too, persons can be so terribly insensitive and quick to judge…  Either way, it was good to hang out and meet up with an old friend.  Funny though how things turned out for many, ultimately it proved no surprise.  Then again who gives a rat’s arse and as Sweet Brown so succinctly stated, “Ain’t nobody got time for that!”

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Photo: Merlin in Montréal opening night play he directed at Centaur Theatre, late 1970s.  

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© 2013-2025 Arvin da Brgha.  All Rights Reserved.

Summer Solstice Vision Quest.

06-2-stan-bevan-b

This most magical of dreams fittingly occurred, on June 21, 1994, the summer solstice, whilst the Moon transited both Sagittarius and my seventh house wherein resides my natal Moon.  Too, the dream occurred during the second or B cycle of dream-besotted sleep that day.

It was truly a potent dream and marked my connection to the very soul of the West Coast.  Too, it was about communing with the very soul of the proud First Nations civilisations which for millennia have thoroughly ensouled this truly magical place.  

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There were two large, Amerindian totemic masks which were each three storeys tall.  They were, however, paintings – oil on canvas.  There were seven different tones of maroon and red being used in the depictions.

All were very alive – vibrant colours, even from high up in the air.  On arriving into this most lucid flying dream, I hovered high up in the air above the site.  The light was at an indeterminate time of day.

It seemed high in the north of Canada such that there was briefly no sunlight, for about an hour, before the Sun would rise again.  It was not cold out.  As I flew, I looked from left to right whilst flying over an old growth of ancient majestic cedars.

I flew here as though I were an eagle, searching from left to right, probing the territory.  I was definitely in search of something of great importance.  In that sense, I was restless until being able to finally discover this elusive treasure.

Eventually, I happened on a large clearing in the middle of which were two large canvases.  Between the canvases the earth was plain; it was not covered in any grasses.

The canvases were some forty feet wide and a good fifty feet apart.  They depicted groupings of Amerindian persons engaged in a sacred ritual.

Whilst in flight, slowly looking on at this way below, I was told by my spirit guides that this was the story of the Esquimalt Amerindians.  With that, both canvases immediately came to life.

I was then hovering in the air but within the fabric of both merged canvases. They depicted the same experience which had been halved.

I suppose that the symbolism of this schism would be the result of the rape that these proud people would suffer at the hands of murderous Europe on the rampage.

With the animation of the canvases, there had been a strong breeze that caused them to come together.  Thus the experience was made no longer halved but whole.  This occurred in the midst of the clearing.

An older Amerindian man immediately caught my attention.  He was quite dark-skinned but it was hard to tell whether he was, in fact, male or female.

Long-haired, he had a strong, proud face with a prominent fierce-looking nose.  The kind of face, his was, that I have always found so drop-dead sexy.  It was a face that was not unlike proud Lakota Sioux, Sitting Bull’s.

The ritual involved the same man being initiated in some way.  To the point of the connection being visceral, I really connected with this man.

I initially saw him from above, from the rear, but then I made it to the front of him where I got a good look at his face.  There were elders present who were more elevated than he was.

From my perspective, I had thought that he had been kneeling.  However, it turned out that they were on a raised platform.

I was now directly hovering overhead of the elders and I saw exactly what they were seeing, in his face, whilst he faced them.  There was no way to get around the fact that this man was in a trance.

This was a terribly intense experience.  Including the drummers who played the most hypnotic of rhythms, there were several others about.

A chorus of women sang, all of which was hypnotic, buoying up the initiate’s spirits whilst he was deep in trance.  The old noble being was questing.

*This dream was so intense that I chose not to go into work.  I simply did not want to be around bigoted jerks.

I took to meditating in the pyramid and really opening up to experiencing this place’s true culture and not the upstart, transplanted European culture.

That very day, I went off roaming, feeling the tug of spirit as inspired by that dream.  I would eventually meet Frederick Hinneault, a Cree Amerindian.

We met at the Club Vancouver bathhouse on West Pender Street.  The connection between us, intimately, was simply out-of-body.

Like the old Amerindian, Frederick Hinneault is a grass dancer.  Frederick Hinneault who was so potent and who would stop me cold in my tracks asking me,

“Are you aware that you use sex spiritually?  I don’t know if it’s something that you simply do without being aware of what you’re doing.  Or you were doing it deliberately because you were with me and you could sense that I would understand.

“But it’s very potent and real.  I will say that it was so surprising to get that experience.  It was quite real… you are a shaman.”

I was quite blown away by the compliment but it really was true too.  END.

There in the semicircle was a feather dancer, in full regalia, he was being initiated.  I was greatly moved by this experience.  The women’s singing was tantamount to the function of the griots, doing their thing, in West Africa.

This was a most potent and shamanic of dreams.  This was more than simply being great music, it was great spirituality; it was a great grounded connectedness both with spirit and with nature.

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Photo: Honouring Our Ancestors

Totem poles at Cathedral Grove, Vancouver Island, British Columbia.

© 2008 Stan Bevan.

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© 2013-2025 Arvin da Brgha.  All Rights Reserved.